Wednesday, 9 September 2009

My son was suspended from school today. I am mortified-more so when I see it in black and white. I told the headmistress I wasn't going to even read the letter-not because I am rebelling against the situation or anything (he deserved it, sadly), but because my son has had so many problems at school over the years, that I now know what the exclusion letter says why rub it in by seeing it again. Strange logic, I know...but it hurts too much.
My 9 year old boy has suffered from problems with his temper ever since around the 2nd year of primary school. I have lost count of the number of exclusions, meetings, and so on that I have had to attend over the last few years. He was expelled from his first primary school-though I have to say that that place was a hell-hole. One of the teachers actually told me once "We don't have enough time to give your son because so many of the class don't speak English". Clearly a case of a school so overloaded with kids that need extra attention-be it little ones who need help with the language because they are from another country, or kids with behavioural problems like mine. So after a few exclusions, the first school I think couldn't wait to shunt him out and get him off their hands. I will never forget the day me and him stood crying in the street after he had just been expelled. I guess over the past couple of years since he has been at the new school, we had slowly started to heal, and came to realise that leaving the first school (whether he jumped or was pushed), was the best thing that ever happened to him, because the difference in the effort that the staff make to help him is like night and day, compared with the first school. This and the fact that my former flatmate (who was a teacher), once told me that she had looked into the performance reports for both schools, and told me that the first got terrible results and the second school was very good.
However-here we are in serious danger of him being out on his ear again-this time for thumping a boy in class yesterday over a silly disagreement. I am very very worried-more so because it's such a good school. I think we would both be devastated for a very long time if he lost his place there.
We have a meeting with the headmistress on Monday, who has told us that she is re-contacting all of the agencies that used to help him (an outreach worker from the local special school, plus the behavioural programme that he attended once, and an inclusion-in-school specialist, to name but a few). We are lucky that she bends over backwards for us. Wish me luck. Apologies that today's subject is a little miserable, too...normal service will be resumed very soon!

1 comment:

  1. You poor thing, that must be so stressful. I am sure that you are already in contact with them but I always recommend people contact ACE (advisery centre for education) as they might be able to give you some advice or signpost you for more help. They have an exclusion helpline and the web address is (if I go back to work it will be as the person who clerks appeals against permanent exclusions so this is my area!).

    Hope that helps. x